cobaltdays:

batbitequeen:

Oh…

As you may have noticed, i literally do not use this account very often anymore. I made the full switch to twitter, where I am actually posting and making real life funny man jokes. If any of the 4-5 of you who consistently follow me wanna see more me, dm me and ill give you my twitter handle

cauldroncreations:

friends: how was work

me:

showbyrock-archive:

ralfmaximus:

leagueofaveragefolk:

huntrad:

owned

Lifeguard Jesus disagrees with the law

Lifeguard Jesus is found in contempt of court and sentenced to jail

rabdoidal:

flyingsquidzeez:

rabdoidal:

boutta head to the supermarket, yall need anything?

yea could u bring back disco

yknow i was gonna make a joke but this reply just legit slapped me across the face

shorthistorian:

Broke: Humors, Hogwarts houses, Enneagram

Woke: Which McElroy brother lives in your head?

color-concept:

There’s a tiny mcelroy brother in al of our heads

taakoshell:

me: I can’t find my fuckin jeans

tiny Travis mcelroy who lives in my head: your fuckin jeans? your jeans you wear for fuckin?

me: shut up tiny Travis mcelroy who lives in my head

hungwy:

e-seal:

hungwy:

war and killing is bad

Can we at least some receipts 🙄

i made this up for notes. war and killing is good

ryangoslingofficial:

typhoidrat:

They’re parachuting into a warzone and they’re infantry so it’s not a war crime if machine gun fire takes them out. This is likely the last words they spoke to each other

never thought of it like that, thats insane. god bless our soldiers